As I am prone to do with any writing space that I start devoted to specific things, the purpose of said space will be hijacked from time to time to address whatever thoughts or ideas that are clanging around the superstructure of my brain. I can, however, relate this post back to art as it is prompted and inspired by the recent Jason Reitman film “Up in the Air”. I am not going to bore the reader (all none of you) with another tedious review of this film. That’s been beat to death over the life of this film’s release and my skills in the movie criticism realm are lacking. Kudos to Reitman, Clooney and cast… blah, blah blah.

For those who haven’t seen it; I will say only that the overwhelming premise of the film in my opinion is the study of one man’s isolation from what society deems as normal when it comes to the relationships in his life. He lives in a high-altitude bubble of his own making, taking what he needs and eschewing the notion of a life held down by property and long-term relationships. It is in direct contrast to what we have been programmed by society to want. Societal norms indicate that we should want the 50-year marriage and the little house on Main Street, driving to work every day in our late model car and having Bill and Sue over on a Friday night for daiquiris and Wii Bowling. We do want these things… we want them because we are told to want them.

But do we? Do we really want to live a life that is empty on some levels so that we can adhere to what the collective says will make us happy? To what society deems acceptable and network television friendly? Are we so afraid of our own happiness that we cease to seek it? These are questions that I ponder often, not because I don’t see the merits of finding someone to share your house and heart completely, but because I know that I see different things in people that I meet that fill the small crevices and cracks that inevitably present themselves in even the strongest of foundations. The dilemma that we face is should we take the good and the bad… or only the good? There is a case to be made for both scenarios… whether we can stomach the consequences of either is what scares us.

How is it that we make the majority of the decisions in our lives on a simple return on investment (ROI) model and can’t seem to do that when it comes to our relationships? We weigh our lunch order on this principle… our method of transport to work… our choice of beer or wine at dinner. All of these decisions are judged by how satisfied they make us feel. Generally, we don’t give these simple things the opportunity to make us unhappy. A bad bottle of wine at dinner is not ordered again just to see if it might be better this time or to give it a chance to prove itself. Why do we do that with people? Why do we offer ourselves up to disappointment? What prevents us from living a life based on our true desires at any given moment… not the overall far reaching need to not be alone at any time. Do I want the good… or the good and the bad? Is the good worth the bad? These are questions I can’t answer yet in the space of this one post and will certainly revisit them as my mind works out the numbers. I appreciate that you’ve indulged me as I ask them.

Filed under: February 2010, Nonsense by M